Thank you Father. You nailed it on the head. I feel ashamed and afraid that he will frown upon me for turning my back on the Church and his kindness from the past.
Priests are human too. They have sinned too. Some of them have turned their back on the Church at some point in the past (and then been restored through the sacraments), too. They have no interest in judging you for your past. They are in the confessional to extend to you the grace and mercy of our Lord. And don't forget that your sins are not likely to surprise or shock any priest who has been hearing confessions for any length of time.
All good points Benedetta. While my fears are real to me because I feel them, they are based on a lie.
I had a talk with my Dad this morning. I haven't been sleeping too well the past week or so which is a red flag with my illness. While we disagree on some things and our talk got a little heated, we are in agreement that my medications may need to be adjusted. I am going for blood work tomorrow to help pinpoint what actions need to be taken.
I now have my priests direct email, but my return to the Church may have to be stalled temporarily while I treat the illness. I hope not for long because I am really itching to talk to my priest. The Church is shouting my name and I don't think I even have the choice anymore to turn away.